Chocolate Pancakes – A Conspiracy Theory


I’m no conspiracy theory devotee. The amount of theories I subscribe to can be counted on one hand. Maybe one hand and a peace sign. But here’s one that I’m all over.

I said to 2 year old Mo “what would you like for morning tea?” Predictably, he says “Pancakes”. I say “what kind of pancakes”. He says “Chocolate”. WHAT?!

How have I never thought of doing this before? How have I been alive for 30 odd years and this has never occurred to me? How have I routinely googled “best ever pancakes” and this has never appeared on the search results? How have I read countless celebrity profiles that mention favourite foods and “Chocolate Pancakes” has never come up? What have all my friends, and presumably the government, got to hide when they bury all references to chocolate pancakes both publicly and online-ly? This is no conspiracy theory. This is conspiracy fact.

I don’t even want to google “Chocolate Pancakes” now, lest the government tracks me down (Edward Snowden anyone? I really don’t want to live in Poland). And also, I was so happy with the recipe I came up with that I don’t want to find out who did it first (at significant risk to their safety). Anyway, here’s the recipe, and it’s amazing.

Chocolate Pancakes

  • 1/2 cup plain flour
  • 1/2 cup buckwheat flour
  • 1/2 tsp baking soda
  • 1/2 tsp baking powder
  • 2 Tbl raw cacao
  • pinch of salt

Mix it up a bit, and add

  • an egg
  • 3/4 cup milk
  • 1 Tbl spoon coconut oil
  • a handful of dark chocolate, all chopped up

Mix it up again, and cook them like you would cook pancakes, in butter or oil or whatever. Serve with strawberries, cream, maple, just go crazy. The more you pile on top, the less likely the government will see the pancakes with their drones.

Keep this on the low down people.


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